You Don't Want To End Up Feeling Trapped, Resentful and Divorced.
I’m no relationship coach, but I’ve been around the block a few times, kissed a few frogs en route and encountered each of these personality types on the journey.If you recognize any of these personality traits as being dominant in your man of the moment, run for the hills!
1. Mr Controller
If he’s showing signs of wanting to know exactly where you are – and who you’re with – every time you’re out of his sight for an hour, it’s a red flag. He might pretend it’s just because he worries about your safety and he cares so much, but be warned: it usually gets worse.
Soon he’ll be checking your phone messages, leaving angry ones when you don’t answer, and wanting to control who you socialise with, and even sometimes what you wear. And when you’re out in company, he’ll want to control what you say too you might find yourself in the dog box and given the silent treatment all the way home after a dinner party – and you’ll have to replay every conversation to try to figure out what you said to offend him.
2. Mr Needy
Warning to both of you: Don’t get married because you NEED a partner: only get married because you WANT one.
This chap needs to be married or in a relationship: he can’t survive on his own and feels he needs the love of a good woman to complete him.
He’s clingy, demanding and petulant – and unlike a toddler – doesn’t grow out of it.
He’ll never understand your need for alone time or even a monthly night out with the girls – because he doesn’t need it.
He also needs constant reassurance that you love him and will never leave him – all your efforts to reassure him that you’re in the relationship for the long haul (or even forever) will never be enough for him.
If you feel the desire to be solely responsible for someone else’s well-being and emotional needs, have a baby – or two. At least they grow out of it eventually.
3. Mr Jealous
Everyone gets a teeny bit jealous sometimes but jealousy is a green-eyed monster – and you don’t want to be married to one!
You will spend the rest of your life defending your conversation with the sales guy at the hardware store, being terrified of being caught alone in the kitchen with the husband of a friend, and will have to give him access to your phone and laptop so he can constantly reassure himself that you’re not having an affair. One word for this: exhausting!
(Plus he might even drive you to HAVE an affair – after all, he’s convinced you’re being unfaithful anyway…)
4.Mr Miser
If you go out for dinner and he accepts your offer to pay on the first date, run! And even if he does pay, if he takes out a calculator to make sure he’s not giving the waiter a cent more than his 10%, I’d lose this guy too.
Luckily this behaviour is easy to spot: you can observe him with his friends (Unlike his behaviour with his ex – which you’ll never get to see).
If he goes to the loo to avoid buying a round when it’s his turn, or ALWAYS accepts his wealthy friends’ offers to pay, he’s going to be a misery AND a miser to live with.
You’ll have to justify every cent you spend and won't have a fridge stocked with champagne and chocolate body paint. Instead your shelves will be bursting with 48 tubs of marg – just because it’s on special at the Spar.
He’ll never splurge on a trip to Paris when you have a perfectly good caravan park an hour or two away – and the novelty of spending every holiday in the communal washing up area chatting to other complaining wives will soon wear off.
5. Mr Humourless
Finally, nobody wants to live with a laugh-a-minute chap who never takes you seriously, but he’s gotta be able make you laugh. If you are going to be together for 40 or 50 years, you have to have a sense of humour. Marriage, raising children, saving money, old age and failing bodies are no joke – but you have to be able to see the humour in it sometimes – and laughing about the mistakes you make along the journey of life, is what gets you through it.
So don’t marry a dour, sour guy with no sense of humour just because he’s a ‘good person’. You deserve some fun and laughter in your life!
Please Note: If you ever find yourselves with any one of these men you gotta say Bye to that Felica in the words of Kookie Lyon of Empire!!
Happy Monday Ladies!!
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